Review: I Choose You Today by Deb DeArmond

Title: I Choose You Today: 31 Choices to Make Love Last
Author: Deb DeArmond

Publication Date: January 6th, 2015

Publisher: Abingdon Press

Genre: Marriage, Christian Non-Fiction

Pages: 257

Source: Paperback from Litfuse Publicity

Rating:

Synopsis (from Litfuse): How would your marriage change if you and your husband made the spoken declaration "I choose you" every day? Even when "for better or worse" is disappointing, we need to remind ourselves that love is a choice. And it's God's grace that makes that choice possible. 

I Choose You Today offers 31 practical ways you can make love last, by choosing to:

*    Pursue your spouse

*    Challenge one another

*    Listen mindfully

*    Love fiercely 

*    And twenty-seven other opportunities to choose wisely.

 

Deb DeArmond is an author, a speaker, and relationship coach—helping her clients improve their interactions at work and at home. Her first book, Related by Chance, Family by Choice: Transforming Mother-in-Law and Daughter-in-Law Relationships was released in November 2013 by Kregel Publications.

Deb’s passion is family dynamics and her writing explores marriage, grandparenting, in-law and extended family relationships. She’s currently working on two new books about marital conflict and keeping your marriage fresh and God honoring. Look for them from Abingdon Press.

Deb is wife to her high school sweetheart who showed her the path to become a Christ follower 38 years ago. Mom to three incredible sons and daughters-in-law. Gigi to three perfect grandboys (with one more on the way). But Jesus is her favorite, and the others have learned to live with it.

Deb loves to travel, and considers herself a foodie. Her idea of the perfect job would be to travel on someone else’s dime, writing about her experiences, and eating her way around the world!

Deb and her husband Ron, live in the Dallas/Fort Worth area. 

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I'm glad to have a Deb DeArmond book on the blog again! This falls into the "self-help" category and is a good book for Christian couples looking to recenter their marriage (or serious dating couples). As someone who has experienced a broken marriage and ultimately a divorce, there are so many things that I either could have done better, or tried but realized it's vital that you both want to make it work.

Now I'm in a serious relationship and we are talking about getting engaged soon. We've discussed premarital counseling and things we can do together to strengthen our relationship and work together within the same page. This book came across my table at the perfect time, and it's definitely something I'll be using for a while (maybe forever).

I Choose You Today is a fairly small book and is very to-the-point. DeArmond gives 31 ways to help your marriage, almost like a couple's devotional. You can go through a new one every day, or you can reflect on a single choice per week (my recommendation). DeArmond gives real-life examples either from her and her husband's relationship, or someone she knows. 

One of my favorite things about this book is that it emphasizes the fact that marriage is a choice. "Love is not a feeling, and neither is marriage. Each is a choice-one that must be made every single day, even if it’s spoken through gritted teeth." It is a choice, but let me add one more thing: it is a choice for BOTH of you. If you work together and choose each other every day, if you keep God center, then no doubt you'll experience a marriage better than you've ever imagined.

Review: Expectant Parents by Suzanne Hadley Gosselin

Title: Expectant Parents: Preparing Together for the Journey of Parenthood

Author: Suzanne Hadley Gosselin

Publication Date: October 1st, 2014

Publisher: Focus on the Family Publishing

Genre: Self-Help, Christian Non-Fiction, Parenting

Pages: 240

ISBN: 1589977947

Source: Paperback from Publisher

Rating: 

Synopsis (from Goodreads):

Many books focus on prenatal development and the health of a mom-to-be. While Expectant Parents does touch on important issues of pregnancy, its core purpose is help expectant parents understand key issues related to the arrival of a new child in the home, offering practical assistance as they prepare themselves for long-term family success.

It's often said that babies don't come with an instruction manual. This book actually provides parents with information and practical steps for writing their own---as they work to create the kind of home and family they choose to build. This includes strengthening their own marriage relationship, setting plans and expectations for parenthood, increasing communication, and preparing for the new stage of their family life that is just ahead. Ideal for first-time parents, this book would also be helpful for couples wanting to explore and prepare for the emotional, physical, and spiritual life changes that come with the arrival of any new child into the family.

  

Suzanne Hadley Gosselin is the former editor of Clubhouse Jr. magazine for Focus on the Family. She is now a regular contributor to Thriving Family magazine and Boundless.org, and the recipient of several Evangelical Press Association awards for her writing and editorial work. Gosselin writes children's resources for David C Cook, Zondervan and Harvest House. 

She is also the author of Faithgirlz Handbook: Let Your Light Shine Through and is currently working on the God's Got an Answer for That children's devotional and activity books to be released in January 2015. She holds a Bachelor of Science degree in journalism and biblical theology from Multnomah University. Suzanne and her husband, Kevin, who is a children's pastor, have three children and make their home in Colorado.

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      Hold onto your hats, new parents of babies 1 and 2 (and maybe 3 if you haven't gotten the hang of it yet)! Suzanne Hadley Gosselin has just prescribed your survival manual. You're welcome.

If you're a first-time parent, this book will definitely prove to be useful for you in a lot of ways. Although the cover and title seem to refer toward the pregnancy season, Gosselin actually exposes what to expect after the baby has arrived. And it isn't just for mothers, but she addresses the father as well and how to be team players in this process: mother, father, and baby.

Not only does Gosselin tackle expectations for new parents, but she also addresses some of the touchier subjects, like how to handle comments of your peers that might be a little less-than-helpful. If you're also concerned about what to do with your jobs after baby is born, then you'll also find some helpful information in here. I think that's wonderful. I'm at the age where several of my friends are having kids, and quite a few have decided to become stay-at-home moms. Which is great! Parenthood is a full time job. But for the person who thinks they might want to continue working after our little bundle of joy has arrived, Gosselin provided some helpful ideas.

The only thing about this book that I think we could use more of, is touching base with some of the more "natural" parents. I was very happy that Gosselin talked a little bit about Doulas, but in terms of breastfeeding and natural birthing options, those were minimal to none. I understand you can only fit so much into a book like this. The size is great for those parents who can't read an entire dictionary-sized manual for this kind of thing. And perhaps her knowledge is just limited in these areas (experience is the best form of learning). But I just wish we had a little more. 

As for the layout, I liked it. It broke everything up into small sections so it's easy to read and easy to find stopping points if you're on the go. The boxes get a little messy sometimes (visually, they're better if you give small enough portions to fit on one page). But other than that, I think the sections were divided well.

For those who are new parents, this may be a good book for you to start with. I wouldn't say it's THE book you need, but it will definitely prove to be useful.

While many books for new parents focus on prenatal development and the health of a mom-to-be, Suzanne Hadley Gosselin's Expectant Parents' core purpose is to help new parents understand key issues related to the arrival of a new child in the home, offering practical assistance as they prepare themselves for long-term family success.

Learn ways to strengthen your marriage relationship, set plans and expectations for parenthood, increase communication, and prepare for the new stage of your family life. Pick up a copy for yourself or for expectant friends and enter for a chance to win an iPad Mini!

One grand prize winner will receive:

• An iPad Mini
• Expectant Parents from Suzanne Hadley Gosselin and Focus on the Family

Enter today by clicking the icon below. But hurry, the giveaway ends on November 2nd. Winner will be announced November 3rd on Suzanne's website here.

Review: Bury Me With My Pearls (Humor with a Spiritual Twist) by Jane Jenkins Herlong

Title: Bury Me With My Pearls (Humor with a Spiritual Twist)

Author: Jane Jenkins Herlong

Publication Date: November 12th, 2013

Publisher: Lighthouse Publishing of the Carolinas

Genre: Memoir, Motivational

Pages: 155

ISBN13: 978-1938499333

Source: ARC from Publisher

Rating: 

Synopsis (from Goodreads):

Bury Me with My Pearls is a real-life, roller-coaster ride of laughter, tears, and stomach-churning truths by a professional speaker, humorist, and singer who, as Miss South Carolina, represented her state in the Miss America pageant and has been singing, speaking, and writing ever since. Incorporating the analogy of pearls, this book uses humor and spiritual principles to bravely address difficult issues many in her audiences encounter within changing roles, self-actualization, and families.

Bury Me with My Pearls addresses the importance of how to guard the countless gifts given by our Lord and that doing the right thing is the right thing, regardless of our feelings or circumstances. It is about trusting God in all things and how he can turn our irritants into to pearls. Bury Me with My Pearls encourages us to develop our pearls, protect our jewels, carefully wear them next to our hearts, and share with others. All of this with a good splash of humor.

Explore how to walk in love while pruning the family tree in an environment filled with difficult people and how God's power is released when learning to trust Him, to embrace the lessons being taught, and to grow spiritually no matter how painful. Like the process of the pearl, so many women need to find and embrace their buried treasures.

  

Jane entertains using funny, original Southern stories, folksy wisdom and singing to help folks live more productive, stress-free lives. Jane believes in the extraordinary healing power of humor and story telling.  This is evident in Jane’s most recent accomplishment of being an Amazon “Best-Seller” for her new book, “Bury Me with My Pearls.”

As a Southern Humorist, Jane combines humor, original Southern stories, and her award-winning singing (you may hear a parody or two) with life lessons. Combining her talents audiences “laugh at” while learning “how to” handle difficulties at home and in the workplace.

Jane is a Certified Professional Speaking (CSP), professional singer, recording artist and published author. Jane’s award-winning singing and humor is featured on Sirius XM Radio and Pandora. She criss‐crosses the country sharing her “down‐home principles delivered with uptown humor”. Jane has also spoken in New Zealand and Germany and is fluent in four languages: English, Southern, Northern and Gullah (gul‐la).

Jane is active in her church and community and serves on an the Parent Board at Clemson University, Commissioner at Piedmont Technical College of South Carolina, Chair of the National Speakers Association Scholarship Committee and serves on the Foundation Board of the National Speakers Association.

However, Jane’s proudest accomplishments are being a wife and mother. Jane and her family live on the family peach  farm in Edgefield County, South Carolina.

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      Jane Jenkins Herlong is a bona fide pearl to add to your strand of inspiration. Very much like Melanie Shankle and Mandy Hale, Herlong brings humor and wit to the scene, even in the most desperate situations. If you're in need of a little perspective, then this book is for you. The book opens up with Herlong's "Mothers of Pearl" where the reader is introduced to the ones who inspired the author throughout her life, planting seeds that grew into [spiritual] fruit that determined several situations in her life.

It doesn't take long to get to know Herlong in Bury Me With My Pearls. She is very open, candid, and has no fear of becoming acquainted with her reader. She takes us through several situations throughout her book of stories about not just her, but of people in her life that added to her strand of pearls. Each story is unique, and comes with its own set of problems and out-of-ordinary solutions that will have you laughing and crying along with them. You will take quite the joy ride through this book, and hopefully you will be left encouraged and inspired as well.

The format of the book is easy to read and easily organized to fit a busy schedule. Each segment is broken up into chapters and subchapters that are short and sweet, but rich in impact. There are only 8 chapters in this book. You will also find plenty of resources in the back to hook you up with more of Herlong's ministry.

The only thing that was missing from my galley was an author bio. It's possible that it's included in the hard copy of the book, but I didn't have access to it at the time. However, I wanted to learn more about the author and was unable to. 

Definitely, if you need a laugh, some encouragement, and a dose of inspiration (so basically, if you are a breathing human being with a soul), then you need to pick up this book. You won't regret it!

Review: The Dave Test: A Raw Look at Real Faith in Hard Times by Frederick W. Schmidt

Title: The Dave Test
Author: Frederick W. Schmidt

Publication Date: October 15th, 2013

Publisher: Abingdon Press

Genre: Christian Non-Fiction

Pages: 153

Source: Paperback from Publisher

Rating:

Synopsis (from Goodreads): 
What is the Dave Test? Basic, important, raw questions you can ask yourself when someone you love is suffering, in crisis, unhinged, maybe dying. Before you even think about opening your mouth and blowing chunks of platitudes, or running, or minimizing the painful, do the real work of living, of being a friend: take the Dave Test. Roughly speaking the modern American mindset revolves around this life philosophy: Minimize the painful or unwelcome. Maximize the pleasant and satisfying. If and when the painful or the unwelcome happens, run. Dispense with it as quickly as possible and get back to feeling good. But what if we learn to move past our comfort zones, transcend our own lives and connect with those who suffer? When we truly connect with others, it is all but impossible to insulate ourselves from life's harsher realities. This book is about the dangerous business of exposing our own fragile lives to the mortality of ourselves and others. The Dave Test takes the demand for honesty, plain talk, and faith seriously.”

 

The Reverend Dr. Frederick W. Schmidt, Jr. is an Episcopal Priest, Director of Spiritual Formation and Anglican Studies, and Associate Professor of Christian Spirituality at Southern Methodist University, Perkins School of Theology in Dallas, Texas. Prior to his arrival at SMU, he served as Canon Educator and Director of Programs in Spirituality and Religious Education at Washington National Cathedral; as special assistant to the President and Provost of La Salle University in Philadelphia; as a Fellow of the American Council on Education; and as Dean of St. George's College, Jerusalem. 

In addition he as served as a lecturer in New Testament studies at Oxford University, and as a Tutor in New Testament studies at Keble College, Oxford. He has been a guest lecturer at the Smithsonian Institute in Washington, DC, the National Cancer Institute in Bethesda, Maryland and the Southwestern Medical Center at the University of Texas, Dallas. He is the author of numerous published articles and reviews, including entries in Doubleday's Anchor Bible Dictionary. 

He is author of A Still Small Voice: Women, Ordination and the Church (Syracuse University Press, 1998); The Changing Face of God (Morehouse-Continuum, 2000); When Suffering Persists (Morehouse-Continuum, 2001), in Italian translation: Sofferenza, All ricerca di una riposta (Torino: Claudiana, 2004); Conversations with Scripture: Revelation (Morehouse-Continuum, 2005); What God Wants for Your Life, Finding Answers to the Deepest Questions (HarperSanFrancisco, 2005); and Conversations with Scripture: Luke (Morehouse, 2009). 

Dr. Schmidt holds a bachelor's degree from Asbury College, the Masters of Divinity from Asbury Theological Seminary and the Doctor of Philosophy from Oxford University.

        If you've ever had to experience the hard times in your own life or the grief of watching a loved one suffer or even pass away, then this book may prove helpful to you. Frederick W. Schmidt becomes candid in The Dave Test as he allows us to explore his journey through his brother's brain cancer. 

This isn't necessarily an easy read. It's heartbreaking and uncomfortable. But I would say that it is necessary. When I was 4 years old my father was diagnosed with cancer, and the doctors told him to go home and make arrangements. He lived for 15 more years, but he was taken home to the Lord my Freshman year of college. It's not easy stuff. I appreciate this book because I understand what the author is communicating here. We can sugar coat everything as much as we like to try and ease the pain or mask our suffering (or the suffering of those around us), but it's still there and it helps to ask the hard questions. It helps to challenge your faith, because usually this will allow it to strengthen. It's a test.

The only thing I would mention is that the author disapproves of referencing "lists" to help you get through these issues, while the majority of this book is lists. They are helpful lists, and help to organize the author's points, but the inconsistency of what he was communicating here did not work in his favor.

Although it's a hard pill to swallow, this is a great book for those struggling with questions and faith during a hard time. Or perhaps you know someone who is struggling. Try referencing this book and see if it helps you. It just might shed some light on your otherwise dark circumstances.

Review: Pretty Ugly by Barbara M. Barnes





Title: Pretty Ugly
Author: Barbara M. Barnes

Publisher: Predestined Publishing

Publication Date: April 27th, 2013
Pages: 149

Genre: Self-help
Source: Paperback from Author
Rating: 

Summary (from the Goodreads):  "Pretty Ugly - How Low Self-Esteem Almost Ruined My Life" is a biography of sorts written with dramatic,real-life reflections of the author's own life in the form of short stories. Chapter by chapter this book shares hard-core experiences and testimonies that work to inspire and encourage others that may have been or may be going through the same types of challenges Barbara Barnes went through that are largely ignored by the masses most of the time. In this book Barbara M. Barnes pours out her heart and soul as she steps into the realm of realistic transparency to share a piece of her soul with the world. The book is an easy read written with true-to-life language and it is pieced together like a literary quilt composed for readers to cover themselves with the comfort of camaraderie and the sentiment of sisterhood. "Pretty Ugly" is pretty, pretty when the comfort and encouragement it offers to real women in a real world is considered. Read this book and break free!

  

Barbara Barnes-Bey is a former New Jersey and Washington DC resident who now resides in Hampton, Va. Barbara is a inspirational speaker as well as a certified Law of Attraction practitioner. She uses techniques to help people with low or no self esteem to learn to "love" themselves, which is where it all begins. She says that one of the most powerful affirmations that one could ever use is simply to state with conviction: "I Can", or I Can Do it!" She says: "You will be surprised how your life will change with those two words. Of course there is more to it than that, but since you have to start somewhere, this is where you should start. 

Barbara uses her observations, past experiences, compassion, and knowledge to aid in helping to heal those who are willing to make a change in their lives. "There are a lot of women out there who are hurting, and have been hurt in relationships and they so desperately are in need of an advocate, an ally to uplift them and teach them how they can heal from their pain". They need someone who can relate to what they have experienced or are actually going through. And once they have been healed, it is only then that they can walk the walk of someone with high self esteem and  self confidence that is vital to every woman who has developed a healthy love for themselves."

Barbara believes that she is a "work in progress" herself and feels that what helps others helps her.

There are currently two support groups in operation in Washington, DC.

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This book is not for the faint of heart, but it is most definitely for the confused, lost, or hurting! Barbara M. Barnes tackles those issues we don't like to talk about. She tackles the issues that we like to pretend aren't there. She tackles the issues that so often control and regulate our lives that it's almost difficult to function normally. Barnes tackles life.

In this book you will find:

• Information the lets you know you are not alone.
• Inspiration to go on when you feel like giving up.
• Stories that prove a person can rise from the ashes of life.
• Sentiments you can relate to that will make you laugh and cry.
• A testimony of what is possible in the most impossible situations.

Pretty Ugly is a compilation of experiences that Barnes has put together not to make the read feel sorry for her, but to comfort the reader in knowing that they are not alone...and there is hope. It's almost as if you've sat down for coffee with the author and simply poured your heart out to her. You laugh and cry together, sharing in the most intimate parts of your self-esteem and faith. 

This is a great tool for those suffering from low-self esteem. It's extremely easy to read because the author writes as though having dialogue with the reader. It is also well organized with sections, heading, and bullet points that the reader can underline or mark for easy reference later. As previously stated, Barnes gives the reader a message of hope. This would be a great tool for young girls, in my opinion!

Interview: Mothers and Daughters: Mending a Strained Relationship by Teena M. Stewart





Title: Mothers and Daughters: Mending a Strained Relationship
Author: Teena M. Stewart

Publisher: Beacon Hill Press

Publication Date: July 25th, 2012
Pages: 162

Genre: Self-help

Summary (from the Author):  Teena Stewart's book, Mothers and Daughters: Mending a Strained Relationship, will help you name your hurts, face the barriers that stand in the way of a healthy mother daughter relationship and forgive what feels unforgivable. Learn to cultivate a friendship, communicate more effectively, and become a part of the change you want to see. There is hope for restoration and renewal.

  

ON SALE FOR .99 ON AMAZON THIS WEEK!

Teena Stewart is a published author, an accomplished artist and an experienced ministry leader Her most recent books include, Mothers and Daughters: Mending a Strained Relationship (Beacon Hill) and Brave New Century (Prism). 

Story Behind The Book

I arrived at my women’s small group frustrated and depressed. I’d just spoken with my mother by phone. Whenever I talked with Mom I came away frustrated. She was a very negative person who found fault with everything and everyone. She was also a non-stop talker who never let me get a word in edgewise. How can you have any kind of a connection with someone who doesn’t listen and doesn’t understand you?  The most troubling thing of all was her inability to perceive that anything was wrong with our relationship. Each time our calls ended I found myself in a dark emotional pit.

During prayer time with my group that day I shared my frustrations and asked for prayer. I was surprised to learn that several other women in my fellowship wrestled with similar strained relationships. Apparently it was more common than I thought. I wondered how many women felt frustrated regarding unhealthy relationships with their moms so I sent out a questionnaire among some of my writer friends and asked for their input. 

The results were amazing. Women who were in good relationships with their mothers imparted encouragements and touching stories. Those who were wrestling poured out their hurts. The idea for my book Mothers & Daughters: Mending a Strained Relationship came from my desire, not to  write a “tell all” book that dished the dirt on my mom, but to encourage women and give them hope that they could improve these connections and enter into something, if not perfect, that would at least be better and less painful.

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Q:  What motivated you to write this book?

A:  My desire to improve my relationship with my mother, which at best could be described as strained.  When I shared some of my frustrations with women I knew I was stunned to learn that many of them also had painful connections with their moms. I wanted to encourage women who felt there was no hope for improvement.

Q:  Tell us a little more about your book

A:  I interviewed many different women, some with good relationships and some with poor ones. Their input on why these relationships were what they were was invaluable. Everything is from a Christian perspective and gives real life examples of these bonds. Based on those examples and my own experience with my mom, I share suggestions for what we can do to bring about improvement with the understanding that we have to set aside our desire for an ideal relationship. 

Q:  Why do you think so many women struggle with this?

A:  There are a number of reasons. Dysfunction can be passed down from one generation to the next. Sometimes moms become controlling because they want to prevent hurt or want to live their lives through their children because of some unmet need of their own. Sometimes there is mental illness. Sometimes the mothers have experienced deep hurts in their own lives so they function based on trying to protect themselves. Sometimes it’s personality differences. There are many different reasons. The underlying thread that I saw as I wrote this work was that it’s because everyone is broken.

Q:  What do you hope women will learn from this book?

A:  First of all, forgiveness. If we can learn to forgive it will help us move on and avoid bitterness. But also, that there are no perfect relationships and if we want a relationship to change, we are the ones who have to make it happen, and not necessarily the other person.

Q:  What is the exact book title and where can people purchase it?

A:  It is called Mothers and Daughters: Mending a Strained Relationship published through Beacon Hill. You can order it via amazon.com or most any bookstore or through my website at www.teenastewart.com.